Putting it all out there

I had never thought about it much until recently but I guess I've had a weight issue all my life. I'm not sure about as a teenager because back then you had to be really overweight before anyone called you the 'fat kid'. I never was. But looking back on how and what I ate, I couldn't have been healthy.

I was raised on fried foods, white bread and starches. We were poor. Leftover potatoes picked up from a field went a long way to stretch the meat Mom and Dad bought. Pasta and loaves of either store bought or homemade bread were a staple. All of this was supplemented with a lot of of home canned vegetables. Besides green beans, brussell sprouts and peas there were sweet/dill/ bread & butter pickles, jams/jellies/syrups, tomato sauce, homemade ketchup and anything else they could put in a jar. Day old donuts were purchased by the flat from a local bakery. We'd package them into 'serving' size and freeze them for Sunday morning breakfast. We might have been poor but we didn't go hungry.

Moving away from home at 17, I didn't eat much and was on the go constantly. I weighed 120 pounds but I'm not sure it was really a 'healthy' weight. A bad first marriage filled with alcohol and forced drug-inducements during this period didn't help.

After that I spent time recentering. Thanks to long walks or dancing in clubs in Baton Rouge followed by hiking in the mountains of Colorado, I finally found a healthy balance. I was at my best weight of 115, had toned legs and a butt I'd love to have again. I was 22 years old and truly healthy for the first time in my life.

Then came a second marriage. Finally someone who appreciated my talents in the kitchen. Twenty-five years later and I'm the second heaviest I've ever been. I FEEL healthy. I'm able to go about my day taking care of everything that needs doing. But at the end of the night I am exhausted.

I do have some health issues. Mostly muscle spasms in my lower back and tightening in my neck due to multiple injuries over the years. Getting my weight back in check will help alleviate flare-ups. I will be 49 in September. For now my life consists of keeping up with my 2 year old granddaughter whom I adore, trying to launch a writing career and taking care of our home - including 4 dogs, 3 cats and gardening. My husband, Bob, helps as much as he can when he is home. He is a riverboat captain, a job which takes him away from home for 3 weeks at a time and home 3 weeks.

I wouldn't trade my life for anything. We travel this road for a purpose. I just want to insure I'm the healthiest I can be on this journey. Tomorrow I'll tell you how I plan to do this. We'll look at the map together.